Belated Penitence
Night. Amy finally asleep. Just James and I in the living room. The clock ticked like a dull blade. He stirred, dragged himself over, sat far across from me on the sofa. "Amy…" he began, voice like gravel. "I know… words are worthless. Any excuse is bullshit." Head lowered, hands clenched white. "Lying, hiding… I’m a despicable bastard." He looked up, eyes bloodshot, filled with abject remorse. "You don’t know how I survived these four years. Every transfer felt like betrayal. Every fake trip… I couldn’t meet your eyes.
Every visit to Vivian… I wanted to drown myself…" He shut his eyes painfully. "Afraid to lose you. Afraid to shatter the illusion. Thought I could balance it… it spun out of control. I hurt Vivian worse, trapped her in bitterness…" He opened his eyes, gaze burning with despair. "…and I destroyed you. Shattered your trust… ruined everything precious." His hands trembled slightly on his knees. "Never stopped loving you. Never." He seemed to dredge up the last ounce of strength. "I… don’t know if I can ask… for a chance… to be seen." Despair bent his spine.
A Fragile Thread
His words hammered my heart. If true, the pain was crushing. But did it absolve four years of deceit? "A chance?" My voice scraped. "James, chances need foundation. Trust gone is like a house without footings. How can I live there?" I met his eyes, the raw pain undeniable. "You say Vivian needed you as her link, Lucy’s proxy. So… what were you to me ?" He flinched, confusion flashing. "You were," I continued, each word icy, "a complete fraud. A husband built on lies. A stranger." "I…" Panic engulfed him. "Vivian’s illness," I cut in, unnaturally calm, "her anxiety, her resentment, she needed help.
That’s real. But it doesn’t justify sacrificing our family, carrying lies alone." I stood, looking down. "James, end it. Now." He jerked back as if struck. "End?" "This toxic dependency with Vivian." My tone brooked no argument. "Tell her the truth. That you need to be accountable to your wife and daughter. Tell her the payments stop. Tell her you both need… to move forward. Not drown together at Lucy’s grave." I held his gaze. "This is the condition. Do it now. Or," my heart stabbed sharply, "Amy and I leave."
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Night. Amy finally asleep. Just James and I in the living room. The clock ticked like a dull blade. He stirred, dragged himself over, sat far across from me on the sofa. "Amy…" he began, voice like gravel. "I know… words are worthless. Any excuse is bullshit." Head lowered, hands clenched white. "Lying, hiding… I’m a despicable bastard." He looked up, eyes bloodshot, filled with abject remorse. "You don’t know how I survived these four years. Every transfer felt like betrayal. Every fake trip… I couldn’t meet your eyes.
Every visit to Vivian… I wanted to drown myself…" He shut his eyes painfully. "Afraid to lose you. Afraid to shatter the illusion. Thought I could balance it… it spun out of control. I hurt Vivian worse, trapped her in bitterness…" He opened his eyes, gaze burning with despair. "…and I destroyed you. Shattered your trust… ruined everything precious." His hands trembled slightly on his knees. "Never stopped loving you. Never." He seemed to dredge up the last ounce of strength. "I… don’t know if I can ask… for a chance… to be seen." Despair bent his spine.
A Fragile Thread
His words hammered my heart. If true, the pain was crushing. But did it absolve four years of deceit? "A chance?" My voice scraped. "James, chances need foundation. Trust gone is like a house without footings. How can I live there?" I met his eyes, the raw pain undeniable. "You say Vivian needed you as her link, Lucy’s proxy. So… what were you to me ?" He flinched, confusion flashing. "You were," I continued, each word icy, "a complete fraud. A husband built on lies. A stranger." "I…" Panic engulfed him. "Vivian’s illness," I cut in, unnaturally calm, "her anxiety, her resentment, she needed help.
That’s real. But it doesn’t justify sacrificing our family, carrying lies alone." I stood, looking down. "James, end it. Now." He jerked back as if struck. "End?" "This toxic dependency with Vivian." My tone brooked no argument. "Tell her the truth. That you need to be accountable to your wife and daughter. Tell her the payments stop. Tell her you both need… to move forward. Not drown together at Lucy’s grave." I held his gaze. "This is the condition. Do it now. Or," my heart stabbed sharply, "Amy and I leave."
NEXT >>
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